The Perfect Baby Blog

The Perfect Baby Handbook—Live in Brooklyn

Friday, May 8th, 2009

I recently popped up in BookCourt, Brooklyn’s leading independent bookstore, as part of the Perfect Baby Handbook “tour.” As this video of the proceedings reveals,  the tour requires me to look people in the eye while making ludicrous assertions about “bird cleavage” and babies who join Facebook. Attention West-Coast readers: In a more laid-back, centered, […]

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The New York Times likes The Perfect Baby Handbook! Yay!

Saturday, May 2nd, 2009

It’s a red-letter day here at Perfect Baby Handbook Worldwide Headquarters on Montague Street. Quite unexpectedly, Liesl Schillinger of The New York Times has given the book a marvelous, glowing review. BEFORE the magical process can begin by which a child (boy or girl) is converted to a hero, that child must first complete the […]

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A rare glimpse of Perfect Baby Handbook Headquarters

Monday, April 27th, 2009

In response to those readers (mostly German) who’ve doubted the existence of The Perfect Baby Handbook Worldwide Headquarters on Montague Street, here it is. This is where the magic happens. At least 3/4 of the magic happens on the main floor. The middle floor is occupied by middling management, while junior departments auch as the […]

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Sasha Baron Cohen to adopt African baby named “O.J.”?

Friday, April 24th, 2009

In his tiny, barely publicized, obscure new summer movie, Bruno, Sasha Baron Cohen (a.k.a. Borat) plays a Eurotrash fashionista who “adopts” a black baby. In the film’s sentimental trailer, Cohen’s alter-ego Bruno is seen picking the newly imported baby off an airport luggage carousel and guesting on an apparently plausible talk show hosted by Richard […]

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Amy Winehouse to lurchingly scrawl a children’s book

Monday, April 20th, 2009

So. Amy Winehouse—known for her brilliant collapsing—wants to write a children’s book to inspire the young. The smoky-voiced contralto has been living the clean life in St Lucia, strolling oceanside, penning poetry, and denying plans to adopt local children and tease their hair into beehives every time they finish swimming. Amy’s book ambitions, however, seem […]

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