If taken literally, the name of my book, The Perfect Baby Handbook: A Guide for Excessively Motivated Parents, might suggest that I endorse the aggressive perfecting of infants. I don’t. PBH is a deadpan critique of over-parenting—gentle comic relief for those who are raising children in the the midst of madness. Surprisingly, its publication has […]

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In the most novel twist yet in the unfolding “Jon & Kate plus 8” scandal, the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review is claiming that the toxic couple is cavalierly planning to send their eight young kids to Swiss boarding schools, so the elder Gosselins can focus on becoming more repellent in a “retooled” version of the show (called […]

» Continue reading "Finally, a “Jon & Kate” rumor that’s too loathsome to be true"

Tensions are running high at Perfect Baby Handbook Worldwide Headquarters on Montague Street. It seems our services are no longer needed! At least according to this Sunday’s New York Times Magazine, in which Lisa Belkin proclaims that the days of “helicoptering, smothering mothering…overly enmeshed parenting” or “get-them-into-Harvard-or-bust parenting” are numbered. It seems as though the […]

» Continue reading "How the New York Times envisions the “end of over-parenting”"

This adorable creature used to have a normal mouth. Then the Italian photography duo, Winkler+Noah revised her slightly to make a point about excessively motivated parenting with their latest art project, “The Puppet Show.” The exhibition, featuring 30 photographs of similarly eery Charlie McCarthy kids, recently captivated Milan. In their statement, the photographers (whose real […]

» Continue reading "The creepiest perfect babies in the world"

As someone who tries to keep abreast of infant current-events, I regularly check Google News for key words like “baby,” “parenting,” “tiny genius,” and “toddler.” Here’s one thing I’ve found: Nothing good ever happens to toddlers. It’s like there’s some unwritten rule that journalists can only use the word “toddler” in tragic contexts. (Do your […]

» Continue reading "Why are toddlers’ lives so ceaselessly tragic?"