If you’ve read A Wrinkle in Time, Madeleine L’Engle’s 1961 sci-fi children’s classic, you’ve met Charles Wallace, one of fiction’s great perfect babies. At five years old, he’s not exactly tongue-tied (“Let’s be exclusive…that’s my new word for the day. Impressive, isn’t it?”); he’s also psychic, eerily clairvoyant when it comes to anticipating his family’s […]

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After my recent encounter with oddly spacious play-dwellings, I began to wonder if the market for such necessities had burst. Could Liliput Play Homes and other purveyors of perfect-child mansions still be doing brisk business, when sales of adult-sized—and even millionaire-sized—homes have plummeted? I’m guessing the answer is no, judging from these desperate-sounding ads I […]

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With over 100 U.S. schools closed now to limit the spread of swine flu, fear is rising. Parents are concerned about children. Children are concerned about their friends. Yet surprisingly few Americans appear to be concerned about the fate of the pig as a super-cute children’s clothing motif. This is wrong. Swine have faced an […]

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When I was little, my friends and I were devoted to the playhouse in Elaine Weber’s backyard. It was small. Mildewy. Plain. No turrets. But Elaine, Christine, Eddie, and I spent entire summers in there, pretending to run a “business” called BS&B (short for Bullshit & Barf). The only thing BS&B manufactured were BS&B stamps, […]

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I don’t know about you, but I’m perfectly willing to read a thoughtful 1500-word review of a movie like Slumdog Millionaire or the irritating/haunting Happy-Go-Lucky. I’m not, however, eager to read 800 words on a pacifer. (And, incidentally, can I tell you from very recent experience that baby carrots taste great with guacamole, especially if […]

» Continue reading "Baby product reviews in 5 words (or less)"