The Perfect Baby Blog

Family togetherness is a trend that makes you wear all-white and behave inappropriately

Wednesday, July 22nd, 2009

If you haven’t quite decided what your favorite parenting trends of 2009 are quite yet, please keep an open mind. would like to suggest this one, “Nature Vacations”:

Family Togetherness

Note the caption: Apparently, the crazy fad that’s leading American families to conduct public orgies on dude ranch holidays while wearing “innocent” white clothing never dies.

I’m confused. Why is this vacationing family behaving like drunken, bisexual sailors? Why are they all dry-humping each other? Furthermore, what happens when some easily shocked horse from a neighboring ranch trots up to that fence in the background and starts neighing in horror?

Perhaps I’m reading
too much into this. Let’s see what a “nature vacation” actually involves:

Hitting up hot springs, seeing geysers, hiking to the top of high peaks…be trendy with the kids this year…[and enjoy] the satisfaction that comes from a day spent in fresh air, and invigorating exercise.

Hot? Geysers? Peaks? Satisfaction? This doesn’t sound entirely innocent. Still, let’s not judge. Let’s allow this hedonistic family to have their reckless, imbalanced, psychologically damaging fun. They will, of course, discover that there’s always a price to pay the morning after, as this video reveals:

Related Links:
The vast, bizarro world of the “Cute Kid” contest
The New Yorker on the “bad parent” trend
The legend of the demonic, incompetent babysitter

What people are saying

  1. As a child my family went on similar vacations and neither me nor my sister-mother thought it anything less than innocent.

  2. I don’t see anything wrong with a loving family moment. Nothing absurd about it. What I do think is bad is the amount of violence that children are allowed to watch on TV. Society has changed we have gotten away from family values, and mom and pop shops. Everything has become bigger, better, more.
    For me simple is better. White is a nice color. I even usedwhite paper lanterns to decorate for my wedding last year.

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