What to expect from a terrible parenting-humor book
Saturday, March 21st, 2009
A lot of people try to write funny books on child-rearing, but few attain this goal. Sippy Cups Are Not For Chardonnay by Stefanie Wilder-Taylor made me laugh out loud. So did The Three-Martini Play Date by Christie Mellor. And no, I’m not an alcoholic.
One book I found less side-splitting is What to Expect When Your Wife is Expanding by “Registered Father” Thomas Hill, which mysteriously outsells both titles mentioned above. Like other “guy’s-guy dad” efforts (see also My Boys Can Swim by Ian Davis), Hill’s book targets a broad father-to-be stereotype—lazy, expedient, retro-sexist, and somewhat repulsed or bored by “female business.” I don’t know any dads like that, but that’s probably just because I live in 2009, and not in a Flintstone’s episode from 1962.
Each chapter of Hill’s book tackles one month in the pregnancy, and kicks off with a charming list called “What Your Wife Will Be Complaining About.” Consider these hilarious examples of wifely complaints:
• “That no one ever shows reruns of My Favorite Martian”
• “Nicknames you’ve given her lately (Moby, Barge, Dromedary, Her Hugeness)”
• “That [insert unfunny ice-cream flavor] is not considered an appropriate source of calcium.”
• “Everything on the “What Your Wife Will Be Complaining About” lists for months 1 through 8
I don’t blame Dromedary her.